Sometimes, an event leaves a scar in our heart, even though we were no way connected to it. Being an on-looker in itself is sin enough for our heart to keep repenting and remembering it again and again, with all the pain and sadness. And also, with a frustration that we have only been onlooker and were not able to do anything about it. Like the plight of the little girl on the train, who could not have been much older than my elder daughter.
A couple of months ago, my wife and I were travelling from Chennai to Salem in the West Coast express. We were a little early (surprisingly so!!) and had settled in our side berths in the 3 tier A/C compartment. Our daughters (7 & 12 years old) where at my in-law’s place in Namakkal, a small, industrious town near Salem. They had been there on vacation for the past ten days. We were travelling to spend a couple of days in Namakkal and return back with our kids. My wife, who had not spent more than a couple of days away from my daughters prior to this, was very anxious to get there and embrace them. Naturally, the conversation was all around our kids and she was wondering whether they would have grown up and all, as if she was going to meet them after 10 months and not 10 days!!
Just as the dialogue was starting to turn into a monologue by my wife, in marched a family of five, two over fed boys leading the march followed by equally overfed parents, the lady carrying an infant, probably 6 months old. They were speaking a language that I could understand nothing off. The boys were noisy and had a smug, arrogant look. The man, whose T-Shirt had almost turned to a transparent clothing due to extreme stretching to accommodate one of the largest bellies I have ever seen, wore a disinterested look, not minding what the kids did or what his wife had to say. This lack of interest didn’t seem to deter his wife who was continuously rattling something. Most women do have this gift, the ability to keep talking, whether any one listens or not. She too was dressed in a tight fitting slawar, her body filling all the contours of the dress like a fully blown air doll.
As the tight fitting family fitted themselves tightly in the coupe adjacent to ours, we became aware of the sixth member of the troupe, a skimpy, shrunken girl kid dressed in what was probably a hand me down skirt and a boys shirt. By her size, she looked as if she might be a year younger to my elder daughter, but her face was that of a mid-teen, which she probably was. She was carrying a huge shoulder bag and tugging along a heavy suite case. The man grabbed the suitcase from her and shoved it under the seat. I was watching all this with great interest when there was a metallic rap on my knee. My wife was holding a metal spoon, testing my reflexes with its handle and giving me a disapproving look. ‘You cannot keep staring at them’, she hissed reminding me of the manners that I didn’t claim to possess. I was not sure whether the rap was for my lack of manners or for my distraction away from her monologue. Unlike the lady and most other women, my wife needs an astute listener to keep rambling. I mumbled something and hid behind a magazine I had bought in the platform. My wife, realizing the futility of her efforts, opened a magazine of her own and submerged into it.
The train started chugging and half an hour had passed when I was pulled out of my forced magazine reading by a sharp cry from the infant which was shrill enough to be heard over the lady’s monotonous drone. I saw the girl was still standing and carrying the bag on her shoulder. The lady yelped a sharp command, the girl flustered around the bag and pulled out the feeding bottle for the infant. The lady tore the bottle from the girls hand with a fierce look and thrust the bottle to the baby’s crying lips. The baby was immediately at peace, while the lady was still far from it. She was muttering, what I could infer from the tone, expletives at the girl child for her lack of responsiveness?? The poor girl looked forlorn and distant. She seemed to be accustomed to this treatment. Once the baby was done feeding, another sharp command from the lady had the girl grabbing the feeding bottle and running to the wash basin to wash it. Even before, she could return, the lady started yelling for her as the infant had soiled her diapers. After a couple more sharp retorts and the girl having cleaned the baby, thrown away the soiled diaper and freshly changed a new one, the lady turned back to her half asleep husband to begin her rambling from where she left. The girl resumed her standing position with the bag back on her shoulder.
My wife and I could only see our own daughter in her place and were thinking how disparate the world is. We joined the two seats to form the sleeper on the side lower berth and made some space so that the girl can sit. We asked her to sit down, which she did after lot of hesitancy. In just a couple of minutes, her eyes shut and she began to sleep. She would have slept for 20 minutes, when another shout from the lady brought her out of her slumber in a jitter. This was for her to go and call the samosa wala, who had just passed by. The whole family had a round of samosas without offering any to the girl and worse, she was handed over all the soiled paper plates to go and dispose off. The girl duly did as told and went back to standing. The lady and her family did not even acknowledge the girls presence when she was not needed. The kids hardly talked to her. The ordeal of having to watch all this came to an end when the train stopped at Katpadi and the family disembarked, with the girl carrying the shoulder bag and tugging the heavy suitcase.
If this was the treatment meted out in public, I shudder to imagine the plight of the girl when she is with them in private. My wife was totally shaken up by this experience. She kept relating the girl to our daughter. A kind of gloom and sadness descended on us for the rest of the journey and we could not think of anything else. Today, even after a couple of months, this memory comes back to haunt me very often. Is there anything that I could have done? I am not sure. Ideally yes but practically, not much. I only hope I inculcate in my kids the respect for the dignity of other fellow human beings, whatever strata of the society they belong to. There sure are many more such girls in far worse situations which I am blissfully unaware off. The least I can do for them is to lament on this blog.
July 20, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Awesome blog! – Keep blogging 🙂
July 20, 2010 at 1:06 pm
Very good write up and very toucing arun.
Karthi e
July 21, 2010 at 2:47 am
Great Arun. Signing off with a heavy heart.
July 21, 2010 at 5:12 am
Arun ,
Truly touching.. those fattys need some humanity in the first place.
July 21, 2010 at 10:35 am
No wonder why this was your first story Arun. It really touched, but it is true that we were not able to do anything.
You have become a good story teller too!
July 21, 2010 at 11:36 am
Well, I’m not surprised at all. I’ve been going through such unhuman acts ever since I returned back home. We can teach our kids to behave and act responsibly, and with our actions hope to influence others as well.
So, tell me about the 10 day honeymoon period now!!
August 6, 2010 at 8:42 pm
Dear Arun,
I felt as if I were with you, while reading your blog and strangely, feel so whenever I come home. (India) The thing is, I did not dare to share such views to many of you fearing that I will be ridiculed.
To be honest, in my family we had such boys and girls (age around 10) and if think of that, feel bad now. Though I would never do it now, I dont think you have to feel for not having reacted in the train. Instead, if all of us would work on giving better opportunities to such girls and boys, the entire set-up (our society) will change on it’s own. Even if you had reacted in the train, by starting an argument with the family for instance, I dont think that they would have even understood what you meant and why you were upset! Do you remmber our NMB or many of the hotels or restaurants or small scale industries where we visited during tech life? There were small boys and girls working like slaves and we were a part of this set-up. All of us had the privilege to be in a good college and we were all from middle or upper middle class families but, such issues did not even strike us. (at least it not happen to me!)
I am not sure if my statements are understandable but will conclude with one further sentence!
Every time I return from a bussiness trip, I usually drive in a nice rental car with dolby music in ckground, hardly hear anything inside despite 200 kph on tacho, enjoy the sunset and overtake the lazy homegoers, call my family and inform them that I will there for dinner, I DO THINK AND FEEL BAD “WHY MY COUNTRY CAN NOT HAVE THIS TYPE OF FUNDAMENTAL (!) LUXURY”? We learned in our history class that our women in “Sangam” period could offord to remove their golden ear ring to chase the chicken! (?)
Something is to be done by us to change this and am willing to contribute to it!
Arun: It was a brilliant narration of your experience!
take care.
nithi
November 23, 2010 at 11:34 am
Arun,
The subject mentioned in the blog is very touching.
On the writing: The command on written English stands out. Context wise, most of the words chosen are very apt.
Good to read….
Keep blogging….
Regards,
Vish
November 29, 2010 at 10:18 am
Thanks Vish.
November 25, 2010 at 12:17 pm
Hi Arun,
Good start!
The subject was touching. I wish the Fat-family had the common sense to understand/respect human values. I dont blame them. May be they did not learn this in school. May be their parents told them that Maths and Physis is what education is all about. May be they are also illiterate and could not afford good schooling, and whatever govt school they attended did not have chairs/tables/teachers/class rooms! May be they are well educated, but their parents have always told them that poor/under-privileged are not humans….!
I wish the parents of the Fat Man & his (fat?)Wife had inculcated good values(good education?) in their children.. I wish poor Girl’s parents had sent her to school instead of work…I wish…
May be there is a lack of Good Education????
May be the poor have no access to Good Education?? May be…..
Right To Education bill –> Is this the answer to all the “May be” and “I wish” stated above??? May be 🙂
Nice one Arun. Happy blogging!!!!
Regards,
Sajith.
November 29, 2010 at 10:17 am
Education today is only Language-Maths -Science-History-Geography. No amount education like this will help in shoring up human values. As long as education is seen as a means to get into a good job and earn good money, things wont change. Schools and teachers should realize that there is much more to education. Human values like integrity, respect for others, dignity of labor etc are not being discussed in any school today. Right education bill as a cure?? – I doubt, but yes, if only the right type of education is provided.
November 26, 2010 at 8:00 am
It must have been a heart rending moment for you and I sympathize for that girl!
kodidhu kodidhu varumai kodidhu
adhaninum kodidhu ilamaiyil varumai…
November 26, 2010 at 9:22 am
Arun,
As very aptly concluded “far worse situations which I am blissfully unaware off” is very true. even though we claim to be in a developing country most of our people still do not have access to basic amenities and their rights.
India is shining only for few people like A Raja (:).
Atleast lets try to instill good values in our kids so that they behave more humanly.
Heart touching narration, Superunga!!
Best Regards,
Rajesh
November 29, 2010 at 1:21 am
Emotional account of a touching tale Arun..!
May God help the World’s oldest culture and civilization…! The human values are only subject matter for meetings and gatherings, I suppose..!
November 29, 2010 at 4:17 am
And blogs!!
November 29, 2010 at 9:49 am
Ha..ha..ha..!
It is blogs like this that brings the state of affairs to public…!
Keep posting..! I liked it.
December 3, 2010 at 9:42 am
Great going Arun,
I was surprised to see that this was your first blog. there’s a veteran blogger’s narration in there.
A heart wrenching little piece this. Very disheartening to hear that such heinous acts are still committed and the perpetrators(that’s who they really are) are left scott free in the world’s largest democracy.
I hope that after reading a moving little account like this, the flames in our hearts would never turn to ember before the words of goodwill and harmony is spread throughout the land. Blogs like this will definitely act as catalysts towards that goal.
A big Hurrah and keep the good stuff rolling on.
Thanks
Vadlamudi Prashanth